Alley-Oop by Dijon

Imagine if these lines were the first thing your partner said to you one blissful morning.

Transcript

Alley-oop by Dijon

Imagine lying next your person. The one who does it for you. Sets your heart on fire in the most wonderful way. It is a mild summer morning and the two of you are curled against one another under soft linen sheets. The body heat radiating between you is just the right temperature. You have never felt so safe, so held, or more loved than you do in this moment. A single ray of sunshine slices through the blinds. It dances on your partner’s face as they turn to you and say, “How do you feel about getting married?”

This is the scene I envision when Dijon opens his song Alley-oop with that exact line.

Hey slim, how do you feel about getting married?
We don’t have to wait forever, 
and you don’t have to know the answer right now

He asks the question so sweetly. I absolutely love that he follows this swoon-worthy inquiry with kind of a no pressure, whenever you’re ready disclaimer. Like, he’s not sure how the person will respond. Isn’t that often the case? We know what’s going on in our heads. In our hearts. But can’t be certain the other person is in the exact same space. 

It’s not even about the institution of marriage itself. It’s that Dijon so unobtrusively makes such a grand declaration of commitment. That he begins the song this way comes across like he was so filled with love, that there was nothing left to say except can I love you forever? You can almost hear his heart bursting. Really, who could decline such a gentle proposal?

Dijon throws his partner the alley-oop, and you can just tell, to even say something like this—he would be wrecked if they didn’t catch it. You know he’s hoping they’ll pick up what he’s putting down. Yet, it’s also apparent that even if they didn’t. Even if they were unsure or wanted more time to consider, he would hold on, and throw it up in the air again later.

Alley-Oop reminds me to enjoy the moments. 

I tend to think too much in relationships. I think about where this is going and if I even want it to go there. So much so that I might self-sabotage the entire operation. I prohibit myself from feeling joy and bliss for fear it may not be genuine. But that’s not even possible. Whether the relationship is authentic or the other person’s intentions are pure—the emotions themselves that course through you are very real.

So, I asked myself, what am I afraid of? Really? Because this self-sabotaging behavior doesn’t save me from tomorrow’s heartache. It only robs me of today’s pleasure. 

Then recently, I consciously let it all go with someone. I just reveled in the time we spent together. The experiences we shared. And the closeness we cultivated without trying to attach meaning to it. 

We only dated a few months but if on any one of those days he would have turned to me and asked how I felt about getting married, I would have found myself standing in a white dress at the courthouse. And whether the union lasted six months or sixty years, it would not have been a mistake. Because love is never wasted emotion.

I understand intimacy in ways I never have before. I would rather feel that feeling of devotion and adoration for five minutes than go a lifetime without. Savor each morsel of care. Get caught up in every magnificent moment. Seize any opportunity to love and be loved with such ferocity.